Mike Senior of Sound on Sound magazine has sent me his Pro critique for this one...
" Overall a full and engaging mix sound -- good work! I like a lot of the guitar sounds in particular, and there's a sense of clarity that I've not heard in your mixes so far. Love the way you manage to bring that soft synth line through from 4:37 onwards. Not easy, I can imagine! Works well in mono on the Avantone too, which is always a good sign.
Lovely fill at 1:23-1:26, and the drop at 1:54 is also cool. The the half-time break at 2:58 is also great, and the following arrangement drop is extremely effective. (The only bit where it feels like you drop the ball for a moment is 3:40-3:45 -- something about the rhythm seems to stumble, and the snare roll doesn't seem to have quite enough internal momentum to carry it.)
For the opening sound, consider adding some kind of noise or distortion at the extreme HF to make it clearer that it's a dull sound in an otherwise hi-fi production, rather than the other way round -- to act as a kind of indicator of the spectral extreme.
The sub component of your kick drum sample lags noticeably behind the opening transient. It's not that it flams or anything, but that kind of thing tends to make the rhythm a little sluggish-sounding. It's something I talked about when doing the Girls Under Glass Mix Rescue if you want to hear some audio examples of what I mean here. I also feel that there should be something a bit punchier around 80Hz in that kick, so I'd probably layer in another sample alongside what you've got (being careful of phase) to provide that without having to process what you've already got too much.
Vocal tuning could be a bit tighter at moments to my ear. Particularly for the "on" of come on each time -- those notes are really important to the sense of pitching in this track, so I'd keep them pretty tightly locked. I'd probably also dip 2-3dB out of the vocal group at around 320Hz. Seems a little too boxy at the moment, and doesn't blend quite as well as it might with the backing as a result, I suspect.
A few of the section boundaries feel a bit abrupt, which to my mind wastes a little opportunity to get the listener anticipating them. 0:22, for example, could have something more before it to let you know what's coming, I think. Same at 1:04, 1:40,
You add a synth strings pad behind the second verse, but I wonder whether you might actually get better value out of something less sustained -- some kind of sequenced twinkling on those same notes comes to mind, for instance. The guitars already do a good job of the sustained component, so if feels like gilding the lily as it is. You perhaps use a variation on the sequencer patch you use for the half-time section, in fact, perhaps with some more obvious stereo position modulation, or double-tracked left and right with different sequencer patterns.
Love the sound you get for the half-time section -- lots of nice character and aggression, without being too fizzy. What I would say is that I'd probably push up the master fader at least 1.5dB at the start of that section, and then only bring it down for the word "come" at 4:00. That seems to make better sense of the long-term dynamics for me. Also, that "come on" seems like it's too early, so it makes the chorus onset sound like it's arriving late. Also, the word "you" that leads in to that section: let that hit a dubby delay tail extending into the half-time section? Just an idea I had.
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